Internet backs woman’s response to fiancé who returned her wedding dress
The internet is slamming a man for returning a wedding dress his partner paid for, sparking heavy criticism over his actions.
The now-viral post with 11,500 upvotes is titled “AITA for taking it out on my future husband for returning my wedding dress,” and it was shared on the “Am I the ass hole” subreddit. ass” on May 26. Redditor @sealine5033a 29-year-old woman and her fiancé, a 33-year-old man, are getting married soon.
According to The knot is Real Weddings Study of 15,000 couples who got married in 2021, the average cost of a wedding dress was $1,800. Additionally, 99% of people who identified as women revealed that they wore a dress to their wedding.
“Wedding planning has gone well so far, except for [a] few things he and I argued about like the venue and the flower girl,” the OP revealed. “Now we’re arguing about my wedding dress.”
The woman revealed that since she was young she had dreamed of having her “beautiful wedding dress”. She can afford it, but her fiancé thinks it’s wrong to “waste” a few thousand dollars on a dress she’ll only wear once.
The PO admitted he might be right, but she responded by telling him she was paying a “typical” price for a wedding dress. And in his opinion, it’s “a once-in-a-lifetime thing, so why not make sure it’s special?”
But the woman’s fiancé wasn’t totally “convinced” and suggested that she rent a wedding dress instead of buying one. He said she was “irresponsible with money” and he mentioned how much money she had already set aside “to ‘rent a face’ (he means makeup) and wear ‘fake’ hair (he means extensions).”
However, the PO has a “vision” of what she wants to look like on her wedding day, and she thinks it’s her “right” as a bride. She ended up buying her wedding dress, but just a day later realized it was missing from the closet.
“I freaked out,” the OP said, “but he told me he returned it and got the money back. I was shocked, asked him why he did that , and he said he thought the dress was ridiculously expensive and a waste of money and he suggested I go rent one again.”
Things didn’t end there, however. The woman admitted she ‘blew up and went’ on her fiancé, something she had never done before. He even took a few steps back and told her to “calm down.” She told him he had no right because she was the one paying for the dress.
“He got mad and said there was no ‘I pay myself’ in marriage and that my attitude sets the tone for the kind of dynamic we will have in our marriage,” he said. – she continued. “He kept saying I should expect him to pay for everything while I keep ‘my money’ or spend it irresponsibly (but I never tell him how to spend his money). J replied that he had no say in how I spend my money whatsoever.”
The woman’s partner told her she should “grow the f**k up” and stop with the “dream wedding dress cliche”.
She said he left and called his mother who also got involved, chewing the OP, adding she wouldn’t let her ruin her son’s “financial stability” with his dealings with money. She also advised the OP to rent a dress or get a cheaper one and move on, but the Redditor “refused.”
As for the couple’s finances, they have a separation agreement with “review to join them” within a year or two of marriage and when her partner has settled into her new job. However, his partner said that if the OP continues, he will “reconsider” it.
In another comment, the woman revealed that “money was never an issue”. However, she has no idea why he “keeps stressing out” about it. He wants to spend less, even on other things unrelated to marriage. He’s even reduced his dining out and “monthly purchases like electronics and furniture, which I think is excessive. What bothers me the most is that he does it with his money and mine.”
She also added that her fiancé still had the money for the dress, and he said he would return it to her once they found a solution.
Editors’ reactions: A “red flag” marriage
Over 4,000 comments have been received on the viral situation, and people are fully supporting the woman while bashing her husband for returning her dress.
A Redditor thinks the woman should call the authorities on the man ‘who stole several thousand dollars from her instead of marrying her, but that’s just me’, adding that the theme of the wedding is ‘red flags’ .
“The bridesmaids will wear red,” they said. “The groom will have a red suit. And the aisle will be lined with bigger and bigger red flags until she reaches the altar which is really just a tent made out of a giant red flag .”
Another user thinks the OP is not at fault, adding that he doesn’t even care that the dress cost $10 billion, a person doesn’t return a bride’s wedding dress without talk about it beforehand.
“And last I checked, your mother-in-law is not your accountant and should have no say in how you spend your money,” they added. “If your fiancé wants to discuss budget issues as a couple, that’s great! It’s the finest and most responsible thing to do. The fact that he throws a tantrum and then cries with mom, that’s isn’t that.”
Some people outright called for the woman to leave her future husband because of the stunt. “NTA [not the a**hole], dump his ass,” said one Redditor. “He’s going to want to control everything once you’re married, including what you do with your money. Run away from this mess, or you’ll regret it later.”
Another added: “NTA he is incredibly controlling and disrespects your opinions. It’s your money and an incredibly special day. I wouldn’t marry someone who disrespected me in this way and you shouldn’t no more.”
One Redditor said they would make sure if they were in the woman’s place that the man couldn’t access her financial information, insisting: “NTA. Someone is definitely setting the tone for what this wedding is going to be, and if I were you, I’d be running in the opposite direction to all those red flags he’s waving.”
Some users even called the situation financial abuse, and one such user called the woman “crazy” if she married the man.
“This is just the beginning of his financial abuse,” they said. “The fact that he kept your money is mind-boggling. Lots of red flags here sweetie. Getting a deal means giving in to what he wants. It’s your future, so beware.”
Newsweek contacted Redditor @Sealine5033 for comment.
This isn’t the only viral moment involving weddings.
A groom has been slammed for doing the one thing the bride told him not to do on their wedding day.
A bride has been backed for refusing to annul her marriage following her sister-in-law’s divorce.
Also, a bride forbade her sister-in-law to marry because she was too pretty.